Y'know guys, I consider myself a good big brother. I share my stuff, try to be cuddly, give them treats, teach them lessons, watch things with me, give them gifts just out of kindness, all those good things. It doesn't always work though. Being the oldest of the litter, whose size would impress a clan of rabbits, you get to know quite a few things about kids and how to deal with them. Some are happy to comply and do what you say out of respect, while others just do the opposite out of spite or because they haven't yet gotten it through their fragile skulls that you know more than they do.
Just the other day I caught two of the sprogs sticking their tongues to an active light bulb after one of they burnt their finger against the thing. They aren't exactly on the same intelligence tier as the raptors from Jurassic Park. Then again, those things didn't cause as many problems.
Well, today I did something rather drastic to help rein in the insanity in hopes that I could get at least one of them to live long enough to see their next birthday.
I may have let slip that they had better behave or they'd have to face the wrath of the Krampus.
Those of you who know what I'm talking about are either facepalming in sadness or laughing like the sadists that you are. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, Krampus is basically the Germanic anti-Santa. No, he's not a Nazi pilot and Santa's arch rival from the December Bombing Raids which crippled supply lines, although that would be awesome. Rather he's a genuinely evil looking critter who goes around at Christmas time snatching children who are behaving particularly bad, rather than giving gifts.
Talk about positive and negative reinforcement! If kids won't stop trying to swallow a cactus covered in bullet ants because you told them not to, then the next best step is to scare them into listening it would seem. I now heavily suspect that 95% of folklore monsters were invented by parents trying to keep their offspring from accidentally offing themselves. Interesting stuff, what?
Well, I'm off to spread some good deeds. Gotta restore the balance enough to get back onto the Good List! Ta folks!
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